Run like somebody's chasing you!

Today is the Nike+ Human Race. Yes, that's the name of it. Derek's been wanting to do it ever since he read about.

So, for his birthday, I bought him the Human Race shirt.

Each shirt has a different bib number so it's like you're in an actual race. I know....cool!

The concept is pretty neat. Nike is holding 20 actual races around the world but for places that there weren't races you could run by yourself and enter the time in on the internet.

The concept is this (taken from their ad): "On August 31, 2008 you'll be making history. You'll take on the world in a 10k like no other. A 10k where every step counts, no matter how fast, slow, short, or long. A 10k where a million runners will celebrate human potential. And you'll be proud to say you ran the day the whole world ran. Just do it." Obviously, the whole world didn't run cause I'm sitting on my toosh as we speak. But I think it's pretty amazing. When I checked last the miles run was 2,882,252. That's a whole lot of miles.

So, we got in the car, drove 6.4 miles and I dropped him off. There were quite a few people out running and we joked that one guy had a chainsaw and if he chased Derek that could improve his time significantly. So far it's been a half hour but I'll update you on his progress later on.

Questions...

Disclaimer to all: This is not a pity post. This is a post that will hopefully start a discussion with other women who may have the same problems as me and ways they have come to terms with what they may be going through. Also, I joke to make this more light-hearted and lift what sadness may be associated with this.

How to start? Well, eleven years ago I was married. Greatest day of my life! Three and a half years after that we decided it was time to start a family. I got pregnant quickly and had a miscarriage 12 weeks later. It was hard to go through but like every trial, you become stronger. We waited three months, like the doctor said (we play by the rules....occasionally), and decided to start trying again. One month passed, then two, then six, then finally nine months later I got pregnant with Brandon. It was wonderful... stars, roses, flowers, kittens, etc. A year and a half later we decided it was time to add a sibling to the mix, because when you get perfection the first time, you know you'll get perfection again! Which we did! Again, nine months passed before I got pregnant again. That was when we were blessed with Kendal.

In October of 2005 we decided it was time to start trying again. In October of this year it will have been three years that we've been hoping, praying, and struggling. I've been to the doctor and he SAYS there's nothing wrong. Maybe, there's a whole master scheme going on....hmmm... Anyways, there's nothing wrong. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not being ungrateful. I'm very grateful for the two wonderful children I've been given and I love them more than life itself. And, it's only recently that I've stopped obsessing about getting pregnant and really enjoyed them. I think I've had more fun the past few months than I have in a long time. I thought I was enjoying them before, but I feel like I was detatched. Kind of watching the situation from the outside while a war waged in my mind and heart about my problems.

I've come to terms that I may not have any more kids and I'm not angry. So, don't worry that if you get pregnant I'm going to be mad at you and come egg your house. Because I won't. I'll be happy for you. Not having more kids has been my biggest struggle because I wanted a whole bunch of kids. A friend explained it this way: maybe when we were all up in heaven just the four of us got together and decided we would work together and help each other through this life. Maybe there's not anybody else up there headed for our family. I don't know.

My questions now are numerous. How long do you wait before you give up or do you always hold out hope? What about adoption, how does that work? What is a good age gap between kids or is there never really a good one? How old should I be when I stop? There's just too many unknowns which I think is where faith takes over and I just go along for the ride.

So, anyone that wants to weigh in, go for it! I know there's lots of you out there who hold the key and aren't speaking. If this diatribe isn't torture enough for you to talk then (when to use then or than....aargh...I don't remember) I don't know what will. If you want, link to your blog and write your own story, if not, leave me lengthy detailed comments on the right way to go about this so I don't do it the wrong way. And, let me tell you ahead of time....thanks...not just from me, but from all those that your words of inspiration may help.

Preschool Fun!

On August 20th was Kendal's first day of preschool. I love the expressions on her face. It looks like she's headed to a rock concert in the first one. Who knows, maybe preschool is like a really good Pearl Jam or Foo Fighters concert! I don't remember back that far so who am I to argue?

In the second picture I think she's headed to the circus. She and her daddy would make a good pair! I'm kidding people, I would never really send any of my children to the circus (maybe only on a really bad day...no, we don't have bad days...ever).

Preschool is gearing up to be a success. The preschool she goes to is awesome! The teachers have their degrees in Elementary Education with their Early Childhood Endorsements. I was so impressed when I went to the parents meeting. Their goal is get every child in the class reading by the time kindergarten starts. Very impressive! I'm excited for her and I think she's thrilled to be able to go to school...finally. She's going to be amazing and go on to do amazing things. I love her no fear attitude! Underneath all that attitude is a sweet, loving, and kind girl who goes out of her way to help and boost those around her. She's an amazing child and I'm grateful she's mine!

Another Tag!

There's not a lot to write about right now and I found this tag on a friends web site so I decided to pick it up and pass it along. Enjoy!

Four Places I go Over and Over:
1. Home
2. Lin's
3. Wal-Mart (Wal-Mart holds a share in my family income.)
4. The Mailbox

Four people who email me regularly:
1. Children's Place (Can't beat those 15% off coupons!)
2. Target (We're having a sale!! All you have to do is spend over $125!)
3. The Irish Commissioner (You've won the Irish Powerball Lottery!! All we need is your bank account number so we can deposit it!)
4. Betty Crocker (Cook better tonight with us! It's going to take more than Betty Crocker to help me cook better.)

Four places I would rather be right now:
1. Pacific Beach, California
2. Seattle, Washington
3. Mexico (Not Tijuana, the nice beaches part.)
4. Disneyland (No matter how many times you go, it's still fun!)

Four people I talk to on a regular basis:
1. Derek
2. Kendal
3. Brandon
4. Myself

Four of my favorite places to eat:
1. Pachanga's (Cause I'm cheap and you can get a huge plate of nachos for $6!)
2. Pizza/Pasta Factory (Love their salads and their pizza.)
3. Parrothead (Love, love, love their smothered french fries!)
4. Panda Express (I could eat their orange chicken all day long!)

Four people I tag:
1. Chelsi
2. Dianna
3. Mary Jo
4. Lisa
And anyone else who wants to do this. So I guess I tag everyone!!!!!

Birthday Boy

Today was Brandon's 7th birthday. I was going to write a long poetic post about how much I loved him and I was going to post some dang cute pictures of him as a baby and show even cuter pictures of him right now but I don't have my computer because it got a virus and it's getting fixed! This was not just a little virus either, this was a hefty bag size virus.

Norton let it in and then couldn't find it to get it out. Malwarebytes couldn't find it either. Granted, Malwarebytes found the malware that was hanging out having fun, but it couldn't find the virus that was making my life miserable. Whatever it was, by the third day I was so sick of it that I was ready to pick up the computer and throw it out the window. Yes, I was that desperate. Every time we got on the internet, whatever it was, was using our internet connection to send spam to people.

Now I know that everyone loves a little spam on a sandwich (I personally LOVE it with my eggs in the morning.) but nobody likes spam in their inbox. One nice thing about Norton, was that they blocked (I hope) most of the spam from going out. At first we couldn't figure out what was going on with the computer. Norton kept popping up odd messages about emails not being able to be sent. I wasn't sending any so I figured there was something wrong with Norton. Because really, how could it be blocking emails that I wasn't sending?

I finally figured it out when one message (out of about 300) from Norton appeared saying that our message to [insert random email address] with subject line [insert random subject, they ranged from freezers to Russian watches] could not be sent. Then it clicked, somebody is using my connection to send spam. Then I hurried and yanked the internet connection out of the wall (anyone know anything about drywall?). Then I threw the computer out the window. Don't worry, I covered it up with cardboard. It looks fine.

Back To School

Yesterday was the first day of school for Brandon. It makes me feel so old to have a second grader! Granted, he is one of the youngest in the grade (he turns 7 tomorrow), but it still makes me feel so old.

Here he is dressed in his new clothes. Yes, that's a skull on his shirt. I'm THAT kind of mom. I'm not sure what THAT kind of mom is, but it's probably the bad kind that lets their innocent kids wear scary skulls on their shirts. I just consider it pirate gear and every good pirate needs a shirt with a skull on it. Justification rocks!

Kendal and Brandon cheesing it up.

Every year since kindergarten I've taken Brandon to school and walked him to class. This year though, he wasn't having any of that. I took him to school and was getting ready to get out of the car and he said, "I know where my class is." I told him that I'd walk with him. He said that he was fine and he could walk by himself. "What?!", screamed my brain. "My six, almost seven, year old NEEDS me to walk him to class!" Apparently, he didn't and I'm now one of THOSE moms. The moms huddling in the corner, quivering, crying for their child that grew up all too fast. Who knew? I thought for sure that he'd still need me up until high school. By then I figured he might be able to find his way around. Dang! They grow up way too soon.

He's excited for school and I know he's going to do awesome! What a good start to a new school year!